Its been realli a tiring week.
I broke down countless time.
If i were to collect all the tears i shed, im sure it would have filled a whole bucket. Mayb even more.
Indirectly, i made my family suffered as well.
Esp when i keep looking into Mummy's eyes each and every time she consoled me.
Then i told myself last nite before i went to bed.
I will NEVER let anyone at home share my misery anymore!
I will go thru tis alone, by myself.
This is my problem and i jolly well face it on my own.
If i were to ever cry again, im gonna lock myself in my room and cry alone.
Then nobody will have to noe wat im goin thru.
But alhamdulillah, im better today than the days before.
Altho my heart still hurts and kept tellin myself to stay strong.
If the other party could face the truth, y can't i rite??
Anyway, its his decision and even i noe its reall unfair on my side.
But i have to remain positive and stay true to myself.
Many times, i kept reminding myself i have to remain positive.
I have to be strong. I have to live the days and get back on my feet once more.
I have my family to look upon.
Its not the end of the world as yet.
I have been hurt many times, but tis is the worst feeling soo far.
Mayb tis is the last time im gonna get hurt and tats y it hurts soo much than before.
Im praying realli hard i can stay true to myself and live my days.
I wanna be nearer to Allah and keep my mind at peace.
I have lost someone tat means so much to me.
Now i just have to accept the fact and carry on with life.
N today, im trying to stay focus.
I will be lying if i say im ok.
But no harm trying rite???
Hopefully things will be better.
Insyallah.
