I am in a state of dilemma.

I am in one word,

Confused.

I dun noe wats happening to me rite now.

Nope.

Nothin concerns the family, werk or even frens.

Its a matter of the heart.

Lately, i have been telling myself tat i should not hold on to my past no more.

Its time i realli move on and let go.

How long more must i cling to something tat im uncertain of?

How long more must i keep on hoping for miracle to happen?

How long more must i keep on dreaming of a happy ending with him?

In the first place,

Is he realli the ONE?

Is he worth the wait and the sacrifice?

Is loving and waiting all this while something i should carry on doing?

Im realli torn.

Should i just sacrifice my life waiting or should i just look forward and move on?

Life have been great so far.

I have no complains when it comes to werk and frens.

They have all been marvellous.

But something inside me is still pretty much empty.

Cos at tis very moment, i am still very undecisive.

Being away from each other helps sumhow.

It helps me decide wat i realli want in life.

I can never deny tat im missing him every single day.

But when i think of all those pain and heartbreaks,

I decided to take a step back.

I can no longer take a risk in life.

I cannot afford to get myself hurt once more.

N i realli dun noe wat to do now. *sigh*

I wanna move on and be happy having someone next to me.

Sumtimes i wish i could start afresh with someone new.

But hell, this heart still clings.

I hope it would just fade away after sometime.

Knowing tat nothin can be done to make this relationship a better one,

I guess i need to make other decisions in life.

I am definitely not getting any younger.

I must start planning my life.

Perhaps the decision i make in life may offend some of my close ones.

But tat is something i gotta do.

I devoted myself to him all this while.

My heart have nothin but his name on it.

But for once,

Allah moved my heart and told me to move on once more.

Perhaps i deserve somethin more than this.

I have been mending a broken heart long enuff.

Dun u all think i deserve somethin new?

Somethin i can be proud and happy of.

Time decides everything.

I guess i have waited long enuff.

N hell no!!

I dun wanna be married when im 30 !!! Heh.

Im praying hard i am able to make some important decisions in life.

If its time to let go,

I will let go.

For now,Im realli hoping for miracles to happen.

If he's meant for me,

Nothin can change tat fact.

No doubt abt it.

Till then.

Salam'